tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30241934.post115715517183933009..comments2007-04-07T16:31:28.881-07:00Dissertationhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10769933541359170781noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30241934.post-1157469720001634622006-09-05T08:22:00.000-07:002006-09-05T08:22:00.000-07:00Great story - really liked it. "I know cause the website says so" is a terrific line.<BR/><BR/>Ooooonly suggestion - given the masculine nature of the genre, I'd set the narrator up as a woman at the very top - feels a little too "ta-daaaa!" when Jesse greets her - think it need more than just the mention that she's a secretary in para 3?BenylinDreamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07277516801146178002noreply@blogger.com